God Speaks To Me: On T-Shirts

Since I quit telling trip stories I've had mixed feelings about what to do with this blog. From the stats, I see that readers still trickle through here. I could take it all down and move on, but I don't feel like I've had the soul clearance to do that just yet. And so it sits.

Maybe I haven't been free to give it up because I haven't told....one more story. I've alluded to it, but I've struggled with the telling and so it never finds its way here. Today when I was typing up my notes from a recent read (Dallas Willard's Hearing God) I noted this one: 

"One can find a practically endless supply of stories about people hearing God, and each is of considerable interest in its own right. I love to dwell on them myself, and I have noticed that other people rarely tire of hearing them, even when they do not entirely believe them" (63).

And in that moment of typing I realized this is exactly why I haven't been back to write that "one last story" or any others that I've got floating ......

Here's the "last story"--

The morning I was scheduled to leave Portland for Africa, I was really rattled. You can read about it here. My brain was flooded with anxiety. The plane wasn't leaving. The lady next to me was undeterred by the details of our delay and continued her night of sleep, complete with snoring. I couldn't find my driver's license after security so I frantically rummaged through my stuff (that story turned out fine).  As the minutes ticked past and we weren't backing away from the gate, I was completely scrambled. Then, the snoring lady roused, leaned forward just a moment, and resettled into her zzzz's. 

As she leaned forward, I glanced at the back of her t-shirt and was astounded. The bold typefaced message was for me.......

Only one person knew this angle on my story soI grabbed my phone and wrote her this note:

On Aug 3, 2010, at 6:49 AM, Jennifer Searls <> wrote:

I just had to tell you that the lady sitting next to me just leaned forward and the back of her tshirt says "prepare for rain" seriously. what are the chances???

Plane technical problems so we sit here in pdx waiting for them to figure it out.

Thx for your support and prayers. I need it

Sent from my iPhone

Prepare for Rain....It was a conversation that went back to the end of May. This dear friend had listened as I wrestled with my hopes and dreams and frustrations and disappointments. Those conversations explored a variety of theological complexities, including the story about two farmers who both needed rain, and both prayed for rain--but only one of them planted his fields in preparation for rain. Prepare for Rain.

Now, here I sat, looking at the back of what appeared to be a youth group t-shirt--"Prepare for Rain." 

Considering all that I carried into that moment on the plane....."seriously. what are the chances???" 

When we got off the plane and I went home later that morning, I was nearly broken. I did NOT want to go back to the airport the next morning. I wanted to "stay home where I belonged." Except....I knew I was supposed to take that trip. It was a terrible day. A difficult night. But the swirling emotions and my commitment to keep moving toward Africa were seeds in the field......

As soon as I got on the plane the next morning it started to rain. And many of those stories have been told.

God speaks to me. I can tell a lot of stories, and with Willard I can say, "I have noticed that other people rarely tire of hearing them, even when they do not entirely believe them." My small group laughs at me because I get messages on the back of t-shirts. I think my some of my stories are Fantastic, as in extravagant and at times bizarre. And sometimes they frighten me. 

And so....I think I may explore that in some future posts here. The details of my Africa trip are over. But it was a magnificent experience with God and I continue to sort it out against the backdrop of my journey through this life.

 

Trip Report

I meant to post this some time ago. I broke our WaterAfrica trip presentation into sections and you can see them here.

WaterAfrica Presentation: Jennifer

Here is the clip from my portion of WaterAfrica's October 21 presentation:

 

I'll be putting together the rest of the clips and loading them to WaterAfrica's site over the next few days.

Today is BlogAction Day

The topic is Water. 5,000+ bloggers in 140 countries around the world writing about Water.

From the BlogAction site this evening: "Blog Action Day is an annual event held every October 15 that unites the world’s bloggers in posting about the same issue on the same day with the aim of sparking a global discussion and driving collective action."

You'd think I could write about water today too. But instead, I used up my brain working on WaterAfrica presentation materials. 

 

So. For my BlogAction Water post.....I invite you to join us at Lake Grove Presbyterian Church next Thursday evening, 7pm. Lots more Water talk then.

My Friend....

I hit a creative slump this week and I need to get past it because our WaterAfrica Zambia trip presentation is October 21. I am supposed to have the media pieces to rough draft form by our planning meeting next Wednesday night. I needed to prime the pump. And so I spent the afternoon putting together a bit of my own story:

 

Untangling a Moment....of Blessing

My twitter feed just ran this from Rich Stearns : "Our charge is to both proclaim and embody the gospel so that others can hear, see, and feel God's love in tangible ways."

I have one more story to write for this blog. It fits because it's about my trip. It fits because it's a story about God's love, care, and purpose blasted into my consciousness with fantastic drama and tangibility. That's been the point of this blog....to tell God's story as it weaves through the details of my life. Particularly as those details carried me to Africa and back.

During my lengthy writing silence here I've often wondered what to do with this blog. I could take it down. But people are still reading it. I could keep writing. But I don't want to bait and switch. People came/come to read about my trip. They don't come to read the random jottings of a stay at home mom. Then again, not many people are coming. That's what not writing will do to a blog. So I guess it's a good time to bend the path a bit. I've got that "one more story" but I'm going to write about something else first.

A couple days ago I wrote to Rute and included pictures from our visit this summer:

David, the boys, and I pray for this little girl and her family every day. They are never far from our hearts and conversations. As the result of a series of life-changing events, choices, and miracles, I found myself in this African village on this August morning. Across the years, the memories, and the miles I came to this moment in time.

And now I am working to untangle the memory.

A couple days ago Jars of Clay released an album with a final song titled Benediction. You can listen to it here.

The lyrics:

Go into the world
Showing how much He loves you
Walk in the world
In merciful ways, He loves you
He loves you

Emmanuel on earth

Yours is the body, the hands and the feet
And Yours are the eyes to look compassionately
To bless you and me, bless you and me
He will bless you and me

Go into the world
Showing how much He loves you
Walk in the world
In meaningful ways, He loves you
He loves you

Emmanuel on earth
God with us on earth

Yours is the body, the hands and the feet
And Yours are the eyes to look compassionately
To bless you and me, bless you and me
He will bless you and me

To bless you and me, bless you and me
To bless you and me

Go into the world
Showing how much He loves you

_____

Yesterday I was listening to Mark 6 (MSG)--

The apostles then rendezvoused with Jesus and reported on all that they had done and taught. Jesus said, "Come off by yourselves, let's take a break and get a little rest." For there was constant coming and going. They didn't even have time to eat.

So they got in the boat and went off to a remote place by themselves. Someone saw them going and the word got around. From the surrounding towns people went out on foot, running, and got there ahead of them. When Jesus arrived, he saw this huge crowd. At the sight of them, his heart broke--like sheep without a shepherd they were. He went right to work teaching them.

When his disciples thought this had gone on long enough--it was now quite late in the day--they interrupted. "We are a long way out in the country, and it's very late. Pronounce a benediction and send these folks off so they can get some supper."

Jesus said, "You do it. Fix supper for them."

_____

Pronounce a benediction...A blessing.....Send these folks off....let's get on with the details of our lives.

No. You do it.

BE the blessing.

That's what I heard.

And the crazy, mysterious thing is....across years and memories and miles, in a moment of proclaiming and embodying the love of Christ to this little girl....I looked into the eyes of Emmanuel on earth. 

Welcome!

I started this blog with the intention of telling family and friends about my trip to Africa. But from the very beginning the story came out bigger than that...I don't know how long I'll write and where the stories are going exactly, but you are welcome to follow along wherever this road takes me. 

If this is your first time here, my Mom would tell you to start from the beginning. The blog reads backward with the most recent posts feeding first. So you'll have to scroll to the bottom, or click through the daily archives over at the right.

The cliffnotes--I'm a trained elementary school teacher, but 5 years ago I had a traumatic brain injury as the result of a dramatic car accident. I live with lingering effects of that injury and as a result, will not likely ever teach again. The journey these five years since has often been very frustrating. Without the sustaining love of family and friends, and the grace of God, I would not be writing this story today. 

My accident story links to my relationship to WaterAfrica in surprising ways, and in August I traveled with WaterAfrica to Zambia. That's how this blog got started.

I'm frequently asked for some particular post links so here they are:

Gifts from the Broken Jar

Our wrecked van & the van in Choma

The OVC (orphans and vulnerable children) visit