God is in my details

I've been intending to write the backstory to this blog for some time and I just haven't got it done. If I don't jump in and start writing it won't happen and I must share these stories. So here we go. Maybe I can figure out how to backfill later.



I know my audience is wide and varied. So a couple things to know from the outset....I interpret my life through a lens of faith. And a head injury 5 years ago dramatically changed the direction of my life. It changed me.



The head injury is important to this story because I am 5 years down the recovery road and I've got a completely redesigned life that minimizes and manages the daily details of my new brain. I've also got a wonderful husband and supportive family who help minimize and manage my new stuff.



As a result of the head injury, I no longer efficiently multi-task under pressure. I don't filter information and noise well.



I also have a panic portal in my brain now. When people describe panic attacks, I think this is what they must be talking about. I told David the other night that it's like my brain leaves my head and goes just out of reach. I can almost see it out there, but I can't reach it and bring it back in safely. Mostly I've learned to control my life to avoid panic triggers, but I've more recently begun working on strategies to manage it when it comes.



I'm pretty sure these are all very good reasons for me NOT to be sitting in the window seat on a plane over the ocean right now. Six and a half hours to Johannesburg.



But here I sit. And here are some stories....



I can't explain it but I am convinced I am supposed to be on this journey despite my preference to be at home with my boys and my garden.



David's parents were here for nearly two weeks in July. They left on Tuesday the 19th. I had been fighting a headache behind my right eye and was annoyed by the bug bite between my eyes. On Wednesday I discovered another bite over my eye. I asked Mom about it and she advised me to see a doctor. I wasn't convinced that was necessary and decided to wait.

That was Wednesday at noon. Wednesday just before 1pm a friend called from Kentucky. We hadn't talked in a couple months and she had seen my facebook reference to my irritating bugbite. She was being treated for shingles and so her problem definitely trumped mine, I agreed. As she described her problem she told me that she was pretty sure I also had shingles based on my symptoms. She insisted I hang up and call the doctor right away. The short story is that I got off the phone and had a shingles diagnosis less than an hour later. I was sent immediately to an ophthalmologist to make sure my eye was clear. It was. So I went home with a jug full of drugs and a distinct sense of peace. God was in my details. If had been left to my own schedule I would have not gone to the doctor until Friday when I was actually miserable. By then the course of the disease and treatment would have likely eliminated my trip. As it turned out, my symptoms were difficult but manageable and mild. I finished my last anti-viral pill the day before I had to start my anti malaria pills. No rest for the drug taker.



My antil-malaria pills. That's my next story. Did I say I don't manage well? I have had my prescription for a couple months. I have had it sitting on the dining room table with other stuff to pack for a week. I don't have any idea why it didn't occur to me that I should fill it ahead of time instead of the day before my flight. That's just the way my brain works. I was organized, I knew where it was.



The boys and I dropped it off on Monday, along with a regular prescription refill. When we went back to pick it up they handed me 2 of my 3 requests and said they ordered the other one, but it would be there the next day. Malarone. I needed to start taking them that very day. I was getting on the plane the next morning at 6:10am. I could not wait. I was in trouble. I asked for the prescription back so I could see if I could find it somewhere. The pharmacist told me I was not likely to find them easily. He had 6 pills, I needed 19. He offered to call around and see what he could come up with. Of course I was grateful. The first call didn't come up with anything. the second call turned up the entire order at the pharmacy right across the street. One of the gals got in her car and drove across the street to pick up my prescription while the boys and I waited. Unbelievable. God is in my details.